Reflection: How Being a Good Girl Can Be Bad for Girls, Alice in Wonderland, and Atalanta

In Tolman and Higgins’ article “How Being a Good Girl Can Be Bad for Girls”, the authors describe the good girl/bad girl conundrum that adolescent females are confronted with. In order to be a good girl, females must suppress their sexual feelings and desires or simply ignore them all together. Just thinking about these desires (never mind acting upon them) can ban someone from being a good girl forever. Females are trapped in this in between stage where they are told one thing and then told something completely different. Adolescent teenagers perhaps feel this the most. Tolman and Higgins explain, “girls are simultaneously taught that they are valued in terms of their sexual desirability and that their own desire makes them vulnerable.”

From dominant ideologies, we are taught that males are aggressive, sexually charged, and incapable of controlling their desires. Females, on the other hand, are innocent, pure, and submissive. Boys’ sexuality is seen as natural and something that they simply cannot control. Because of this, girls have to regulate their own sexual behavior as well as their partners. Females are constantly on the brink of becoming a bad girl if they do not fulfill their duties of keeping themselves and their partners in check.

The authors then go on to explain some of the legal sanctions that these ideologies affect. In cases of rape and sexual assault, lawyers and juries will often bring the females’ sexual past into question or imply that perhaps she wanted to have sex or to “fool around”. If a female exhibits sexual desire or if she initially wants to participate in an activity and then changes her mind, she is not being a good girl. She is cast off as a bad girl and is often deemed as deserving of any consequences that may come from this desire. This is a blatant attempt to blame the victim based off of irrelevant past information. The authors put it perfectly when they said “to want anything is to consent to everything…the expression f her desire undermines the credibility of her refusal.”

The inconsistencies between men and women are further examined in the double standards that are present in our society. Men are praised for their sexual conquests, high fived by their friends for sleeping with a girl, and are expected to sleep with multiple people. If a girl does the same thing she is a “slut” or a “whore”. One of the women whose stories was told in this piece explained it very well by saying, “I mean the guy expects the girl to be a sweet little virgin when he marries her, and then he can be running around with ten other women, but when he’s getting married to her, she’s not supposed to have any relationship with anybody else.” In order to find a man and get married (which is apparently the only goal a woman should have) she needs to stay pure until she finds her perfect match. She is not allowed to express herself sexually or have relationships with whomever she wishes, if she does then she better be ready for the consequences and the names that she will be called.

Alice in Wonderland and the story of Atalanta attempt to break down these walls and challenge these dominant ideologies. They show the audience that a girl does not need a man to live happily ever after. These two films show how a girl really should be in charge of her own destiny and make decisions based off of what she wants and desires. The main characters break away from their pre-chosen path and do whatever it is that makes them happy. Alice and Atalanta refuse to simply become housewives and seek out their own wonderful adventures.

Alice is the portrait of a strong, powerful female character who challenges traditional gender roles. She first does this by running away from her engagement party to go and decide if she even wants to marry Hamish. She is expected to get married, have children, and be a house wife but that is simply not the life that she desires. By putting on a suit of armor, battling the Jabberwocky, and becoming the action hero she defies expectations and learns that traditional gender roles do not have to define what she can and cannot do. She also challenges gender stereotypes and is both beautiful and strong. Her physical strength increases throughout the film but it does not compromise her beauty. The film shows that a female can be both strong and attractive. Lastly, Alice’s happily ever after does not come from a man or getting married but from her own desires and her amazing adventure.

Atalanta’s story is similar to Alice’s. She also does not want to simply accept her fate and marry whoever her father chooses. When her father decides to have a race to determine which suitor will have her hand in marriage, Atalanta proposes that she compete in the race as well. Breaking down gender stereotypes, she trains for, competes in, and ultimately wins the race against the men. Her decision is simply not to marry at all and instead to go see all the great cities of the world. She wants to have her own personal adventure and do whatever it is that she desires. Atalanta explains that perhaps when she comes back from her journey she will marry someone. For now, however, she is doing what makes her happy and carves her own destiny.

Talking Point

I think it is interesting to compare the new Alice to previous depictions of the same character. Tim Burton obviously chose to change the story up a little bit and make Alice a more powerful character. That character’s depiction in this film is unlike any other one. I would be intrigued to see how the class feels about this and why they think Burton chose to portray her in that way.